Lawndale Fair IV: Hey Daria!
by Warpedkjh13
Summary: The kids from 'Hey Arnold' appear, and mischievous hijinks occur.


HEY DARIA!  
  
written by Warpedkjh13  
  
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This fan fiction is a sequel to my first, second and third Daria fan fictions, Daria's Run, Beavis, Butt-Head and... Upchuck, and The Search For Jesse. It is focused on the school fair in which Daria's Run, B,B&U and D3:TSFJ were told. It also features Beavis and Butt-Head and the characters from Hey Arnold. By the time I've finished all of these, it'll be Christmas! Agh!  
  
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SCENE ONE: BAND STAGE  
  
MS. LI: And now, the musical talent of P.S. 118, from somewhere near New York.  
  
(There is a very feeble clap from the audience. The characters from Hey Arnold start singing a poor rendition of the Daria theme.)  
  
HELGA: Criminy! This song sucks big time.  
  
GERALD: Where are we anyway?  
  
ARNOLD: I don't know and I don't want to know.  
  
DARIA: Strange little kids.  
  
JANE: They sort of look like the people in my painting "People With Misshaped Heads".  
  
ARNOLD: Hey, look at all the girls out there. (looks at Brittany) Look at the blonde!  
  
GERALD (focusing on Jodie): I've found my share of the action.  
  
(Helga turns red.)  
  
ARNOLD (spots Kevin): Aww.  
  
GERALD (spots Mack): Aww.  
  
DARIA: This is going to be a long day.  
  
HELGA: That's it, I'm moving out.  
  
GERALD: Same here. I'm a ladies man and I want to meet some ladies.  
  
JANE: Well, jeez, kid. I think Beavis, Butt-Head and Upchuck have them all covered.  
  
BEAVIS/CORNHOLIO (O.C.): Are you threatening me? Corrrrrnnhooooolio!  
  
(Hey Arnold credits play, shortly followed by the Daria credits.)  
  
MS. LI: Ah, kids. These are Daria, Jane and... Trent?  
  
TOM: It's Tom.  
  
MS. LI: Ah yes. Anyway, the assigned guide for these children is... um... busy-  
  
UPCHUCK (O.C.): Heh heh. Cornhole.  
  
MS. LI: So I'm handing custody to you.  
  
DARIA: Oh great.  
  
HELGA: Stop your whinging! Daria and Jane look cool and pretty damn popular if you ask me!  
  
(Daria and Jane look at each other doubtfully.)  
  
ARNOLD: Yeah, I guess you aren't that bad.  
  
JANE: So kiddies, what are your names.  
  
GERALD: I'm Gerald Johannsen, this is Helga Pataki, and this is Arnold-  
  
TOM: I'm hungry.  
  
DARIA: Yeah, me too. Hey kids, how about we go get something to eat and watch some idiots play football?  
  
ARNOLD: Sounds great.  
  
HELGA (thought): Oh, Arnold... Arnold... my love... shut up! Damn raging hormones!  
  
GERALD: Yeah, why not?  
  
HELGA: It's okay by me.  
  
JANE: I like idiocy.  
  
DARIA: These kids are cool.  
  
TOM: Hi kids, I'm Tom Sloane. This is Daria Morgendorffer and Jane Lane.  
  
GERALD: Are you two going out?  
  
DARIA: Don't ask stupid questions and I won't give stupid answers.  
  
GERALD: Sorry.  
  
DARIA: Look. There's a TV over there. Watch it. You can watch your cartoons that are filled with mindless violence.  
  
JANE: Daria!  
  
DARIA: Okay, come with me.  
  
TOM: What do you want to eat?  
  
HELGA: Cotton candy! Yum!  
  
(They bump into Tad and Tricia.)  
  
TAD: Daria!  
  
TRICIA: How are you?  
  
DARIA: Are you lost again? I don't remember seeing any windmills around here. [1]  
  
TAD: No, we're cool.  
  
TRICIA: We want candy!  
  
DARIA: You told me candy was poison.  
  
TAD: There are liars in the world.  
  
JANE: I'm glad to see you've made a permanent mark on these impressionable kids.  
  
COMMERCIAL BREAK 1: DARIA RUNNING INTO TAD AND TRICIA  
  
SCENE TWO: COTTON CANDY STALL  
  
BGM: ELECTRIC LIGHT ORCHESTA - ABOVE THE CLOUDS  
  
(Monique walks up to them.)  
  
MONIQUE: Hey Daria.  
  
DARIA: Hey Monique. How's Trent?  
  
MONIQUE: He's resting after his big concert.  
  
(Focus on Trent, sleeping while standing backstage.)  
  
JANE: Good concert by the way.  
  
MONIQUE: I know. Word says there is a record producer looking for Trent. Better go wake him.  
  
JANE: You know the drill.  
  
MONIQUE: I sure do. See you.  
  
DARIA: See you.  
  
(Monique walks off.)  
  
MONIQUE (O.C.): Trent! Jesse smashed your guitar!  
  
JANE: She's so inventive.  
  
ARNOLD: Is Trent that guy who was playing before us?  
  
DARIA: Yeah.  
  
GERALD: He's cool.  
  
JANE: You have no idea.  
  
SCENE THREE: BACKSTAGE  
  
RECORD PRODUCER: I like your sound.  
  
TRENT: It wasn't our song.  
  
RECORD PRODUCER: It doesn't matter. You can be the first band on our label, Mixtown Records [2].  
  
JESSE: Okay.  
  
TRENT: We accept.  
  
(The band rejoice.)  
  
RECORD PRODUCER: Cool. I'll be seeing you tomorrow afternoon then?  
  
TRENT: Well, yeah!  
  
DARIA: Hey Trent.  
  
TRENT: Daria, we're making an album.  
  
(Trent runs up and hugs her, and Daria gives an unmistakable blush.)  
  
JANE: Ha!  
  
DARIA: Oh, shut up.  
  
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END CREDITS MUSIC: Set Me Free - The Sweet  
  
Alter Egos  
  
Daria - Aunt Amy  
  
Marge Simpson  
  
Tom - Jack Torrance (from The Shining)  
  
Hannibal Lecter  
  
Jane - Van Gogh (I know, I used it before, I just like it)  
  
A very shoddy imitation of Brittany  
  
Monique - Liza Minelli  
  
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FOOTNOTES (I hate footnotes, I'm sorry I had to do them)  
  
[1] - Tad got lost when he saw some windmills in a window in "I Loathe A Parade"  
  
[2] - I don't know whether Mixtown Records really exists or not, so please don't e-mail me saying CHANGE THAT LABEL NAME because it was an honest mistake.  
  
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NOTES:  
  
I would really appreciate some appreciative criticism, don't just tell me I suck bigtime. I really don't want to hear it. Arnold and the gang will be in the final episode, then I shall go on to single stories. The things Mystik Spiral go through to make the album will be a story, as will another aunt story. I think that Aunt Amy needs more recognition. By the way, another great Daria fanfic is Heroes by Lew Richardson and it made me realize that Monique was better as a good character, unlike her portrayal in Diane Long's Undone. LONG NOTES! WHEW!  
  
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THE END  
  
All rights belong to MTV and Nickelodeon. Pretty please dont sue, I'm only borrowing! 


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